ACME products

There's a discussion about this over at "the other place," so I thought that we'd bandy the topic about.
ACME products, from A Company that Makes Everything, literally. Stuff no sane person would ever want / need / buy, or even think to invent in the first place. One glaring example:
Earthquake Pills, from the Road Runner cartoons.

Who would want to create earthquakes? At all? Something to prevent or mitigate them, certainly. But allowing that they were aiming for a military application, then why make several hundred, and put them in a bottle and then sell them over the counter? And somebody bought a bottle. Of earthquake pills. Not some general or colonel from the Pentagon, but some goofus in New Mexico. Granted, it's sparsely populated, but just the idea of some unsupervised klutz with questionable morals walking around with the ability to generate earthquakes on a whim ... and nobody has a problem with this.

Apparently, the Looney Tunes universe is populated purely by lunatics, unconcerned that WMD's are being mass-produced and sold free-market to motivated cuckoos. Oh, doesn't that just explain everything? Hence, the ACME Corporation makes patently insane things, because their clientele are terminally bonkers.

In addition to products, ACME also has a baby sitting agency and a theatrical agency.

ACME—our lunatics serve your fanatics.

ACME even makes weapons. For example; the ACME Disintegrating Pistol. Boy when it disintegrates, it disintegrates.

^ And ACME also makes the Re-Integrating Pistol. Presumably necessitated by an attempted coup at the ACME factory. This, in turn, likely caused the ACME chairman to consider monkeys as employees.

There's also the ACME Rocket Sled: a rocket powered capsule that's supposed to follow a monorail track (not included, sold separately) at insane speed. Of course, this is also escape velocity; therefore, it launches into orbit instead of following the track. And this also begs the Karl Benz Question: how do you make the thing stop? As nearly as I can tell, the ACME catalog is like a Sears catalog pandering to those with too much money and too little sanity.

You know.... I just so happen to have an ACME catalog. It came with the book, "The Looney Tunes Treasury." Here are a few examples.

Saltyboot, that ACME catalog is a wonder in just three pages! That's pure Stan Freberg kind of humor. Thank you for posting that!
And, did someone mention rocket sleds? (This model seats two.)

There are many cartoon characters I'd like to see fall into portable holes.

How about those ACME refrigerators? To look at, they're the rounded white boxes like all the other models. Thing is, it can make ice cubes continuously without a water supply, and run continuously without being plugged into an electric outlet. On top of that, an ACME refrigerator is lightweight enough to be carried around like a large backpack. How is this possible?

Eh, let's go with the old stand-by: A Wizard Did It.

There's also the ACME Anti-Nightmare Machine. Used to calm the dreams of young men who are afraid to join the Army.

I'll admit it, when I was a kid, I always wanted one of those Acme Indestructo Steel Balls from "I'm Just Wild About Hurry." The animation of the Coyote rolling around in that thing just made it look so much fun!

I would love to commute in one of those things. Outta my way!

There's also the ACME Toothpicks from Lumber Jerks. It takes one entire tree to make a single toothpick. ACME also makes the trees into Artificial Fireplace Logs.